The Whole Ball Of Wax

Written By – Laurie Gelman
Transcribed By – Paul Booth

Cast

Sabrina - Melissa Joan Hart
Hilda - Caroline Rhea
Zelda - Beth Broderick
Salem - Nick Bakay
Morgan - Elisa Donovan
Josh - David Lascher
Miles - Trevor Lissauer
Roxie - Soleil Moon Frye
Harvey - Nate Richert
Mike Shelby - George Wendt
Chief Council Member – James Marsh
Female Council Member – Hayley Taylor
Diana – Alley Mills
Male Council Member – Masi Oka
Bailiff – Christopher Michael
Eric – Dante Spencer
Ingrid – Annie Little
Male Model #2 – T. J. Hoban
Male Model #3 – John Coulter
Female Model #2 – Amanda Tosch
Female Model #3 – Natalia Sokolova

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the characters in this transcript, nor do I own any rights to the television show Sabrina, the Teenage Witch. It was created by Nell Scovell and belongs to her, Viacom Productions Inc, Hartbreak Films, and the Warner Brothers Television network. The characters are based on the original characters appearing in Archie Comics.

Int. College house. Miles and Sabrina enter.

Miles- ...So my shrink said I’m to let go and just accept...

He comes to a startled halt as does Sabrina at his shoulder.

Miles- (Cont.) ...that paradise has arrived at my doorstep.

There are three of them and they’re exceptionally tall, slim and beautiful with legs that reach all the way to the ground.

Sabrina- You know, if this is my Victoria’s Secret order, they have a whole new way of delivering.

Morgan hurries down the stairs with a tape measure draped round her neck, a pin cushion strapped to her wrist and a large swathe of deep mauve fabric.

Morgan- (To the models) Ladies! Ladies! Shoulders high, chests out and get ready to be Morganised.

The models throw out their chests as Morgan kneels beside the tallest, blondest and most chest outist of them and wraps the fabric around her waist.

Sabrina- Why is our living room filled with amazons in acrylics?

Morgan- It’s for my fashion design class. The final is going to be a spectacular fashion show featuring the student’s creations. Designers from all over the world will be there.

Sabrina- Hey, maybe, if you play your cards right, you’ll get to meet Stella McCartney... and get me Paul’s autograph.

Morgan- If all goes according to plan and none of my models trip on the catwalk, (To the models) Big hint! (To Sabrina) The McCartney’s will be asking for my autograph.

Miles- Morgan, I know how much this show means to you and if it will help, I, a former dancer, will be more than happy to teach these models how to strut their stuff.

The three models crack up laughing causing Morgan’s mauve skirt creation to slip it’s pins and fall to the floor.

Morgan- (Annoyed) Thanks a lot! Now I have to re-do Helga. (To the girls) Let’s go upstairs where I can get some work done.

They all traipse off up to Morgan’s room. Miles stomps off towards his room followed by Sabrina.

Miles- Boy, I bet any girl would kill to look like that.

Sabrina- Please! What to they have that I don’t?

Miles- Ten feet o' legs!

He continues into his room while Sabrina stops outside hers to think about it.

Sabrina- Hmm, I wouldn’t mind ten feet of legs.

She points at herself and Whack!

Sabrina- (Cont.)(Rubbing her sore head) Ugh! If I didn’t have an eight foot ceiling.

Run opening credits.

Int. Hilda’s Coffee House. Morgan and her three leggy models are at the counter being served by Hilda. Miles has decided a permanent record should be kept of all those legs and his filming then with is video camera from very close range. Get off your knees boy!

Morgan- My models are getting tired of black coffee and chicken broth, so I told them you’d whip up three of your fat-free lattes.

Hilda- Right, because this bunch really needs to count calories. (To the models) Trust me ladies, these are going to taste just like the real thing.

Morgan- Thanks.

She leads her models, and perforce their hanger on, off to a table beside Josh while Hilda takes a whipped cream aerosol from under the counter and fills three cups with cream. Miles breaks off his filming.

Miles- Excellent ladies. Now I’d like to get a second take.

Josh- Yeah, I bet you would.

Miles- Standing.

The three models stand and so does Josh.

Josh- (Aside to Miles) I want a copy of all the takes you shoot, including bloopers. Goodman, how’d you land this dream job?

Miles- I realised that Morgan’s fashion show would make a brilliant documentary.

Josh- And she bought that pitch?

Miles nods yes as Sabrina enters and walks to the counter where Hilda is finishing adding the calories to the models drinks with a sugar dispenser.

Sabrina- Aunt Hilda, can I ask you a strange question?

Hilda- Sure.

Sabrina- (Looking around) Have you ever felt like someone is following you?

Hilda- No.

Sabrina- I just have this eerie feeling that wherever I go someone is watching me.

Hilda- Trust me Sabrina, no one is watching you.

Sabrina- How do you know?

Hilda- Because everyone is watching them.

She points at the three amazons who are posing for Miles before picking up her tray of fat rich drinks and taking them over.

Hilda- If I had legs like them I’d be dangerous.

Sabrina- (Following) Oh, a word of caution. If you’re going to try it; do it outside.

Hilda- (Serving the drinks) Here we are, three fat-free lattes.

As Sabrina watches smiling, she catches movement out of the corner of her eye. A cloaked figure flits across outside the coffee house in dark glasses but vanishes before Sabrina can get a better look.

Int. Adams Collage hallway. An edgy and nervous Sabrina catches up with Roxie.

Sabrina- There it is again!

Roxie- What?

Sabrina- That feeling! I’m tell you, someone is following me.

Roxie- Yeah, about a thousand other people late for class the way that I am. Do yourself a favour and lose the paranoia, okay.

She gives Sabrina a reassuring pat on the shoulder and hurries off to class. Sabrina stands there a second before, out of the corner of her eye, she spots the billow of a cloak as it disappears around a corner. She runs after, but there’s no one there. She hurries to the next corner but other than the odd student there’s no sign of her stalker.

Sabrina- Okay, I don’t think it’s called paranoia when someone really is following you.

She moves off and doesn’t see the cloaked and shadowy person slip out of a classroom behind her. Sabrina determines to prove that the cloaked figure is the only one who can skulk around in the corridors and hides herself behind a trashcan. As she peeps around the side she sees her stalker weave her way through the students, her black cloak all a billow.

Sabrina- (To herself) That’s right. Welcome to my parlour. (Regarding the trashcan) Phew! Time to change that bag.

She slips into the science classroom beside the trashcan to complete her stalker trap making sure that the cloaked figure sees her.

Int. Science class. Sabrina is hidden behind one of the benches and hears the stalker enter. She jumps out waving a large glass beaker above her head.

Sabrina- Okay! The jig is up…!

He jaw drops, along with the large glass beaker that smashes into little pieces.

Sabrina- (Cont.) Mom?!

Diana- (Removing the sunglasses) Yes sweetheart, it’s me.

They hug.

Sabrina- I can’t believe it! What are you doing here?

Diana- Well originally I just came to see you, now I guess I’ll be sweeping up glass.

Sabrina- Oh forget the glass, I’m worried about you. The Witches Council said that if we ever came face to face, you’d be turned into a ball of wax.

Diana- Oh I know. But the truth is, I’ve been flying up from Peru every year to secretly check up on you. Usually I do it from a distance but this year you changed the game plan.

Sabrina- Wait a minute! We’re looking at each other and you’re not a ball of wax!

Diana- Oh my sweet girl!

There’s a lot of excited hugging and kissing.

Sabrina- Oh it’s so great to see you.

Diana- Maybe the Witches Council decided to nullify the decree?

And then again perhaps not as Sabrina’s mom suddenly stiffens and starts to glow. She shrinks in on herself until all there is left is a large ball of white wax with Diana’s face on it.

Sabrina- So much for that theory.

Diana- I hate decrees!

Sabrina gingerly picks her mother, the candle, up as students start to enter the class room. They give her an odd look as she cradles the large ball of wax in her arms.

Sabrina- (To the students) Oh tch! Right, like you’ve never hugged your mother?

Int. College House. Miles is interviewing Morgan on film as she shows off her designs.

Morgan- I’m no psychic but I predict that by fall, every forward guy on campus will have his legs in my pants... Let me rephrase that...

Miles- (Interrupting) Next question. How would you, the designer, describe the aesthetic vision behind Morganwear?

Morgan- Well I like to think of myself...

Roxie- (Interrupting) Constantly.

Morgan- (To camera) Oh, that’s Phoebe. She threads my bobbins. Anyway, back to the clothes. I would describe my look as part Versace, part Dolce, hold the Gabbana.

Roxie- (Pushing Morgan away from the camera) Hold the ego trip. Here’s the truth about her clothes, and all clothes. They’re just there to cover out bodies - period. And the fashion industry should be ashamed for making women who aren’t wearing the latest styles feel bad about themselves.

Morgan- They should feel bad. It’s every woman’s responsibility to be au carom.

Miles- I don’t know what that means... but the audience at Sundance will.

The doorbell rings and Morgan runs over to answer it. Three tall, well built, handsome male models enter.

Eric- Hi...

Morgan- (Interrupting) Don’t ‘Hi’ me, you’re five minutes late. Now all of my fittings are behind schedule.

Eric- By five stupid minutes!

Miles- Pre fashion show tension is beginning to build between designer and...

Eric- (Interrupting) Student, volunteering his time for free.

Roxie- I’m curious. How do you feel about parading yourself in front of people knowing they’re looking at you like a piece of meat?

Eric- Ha-ha, I don’t think people look at me like that. They respect me as an intelligent individual who aspires to a serious modelling career.

He checks his refection in Miles’ camera lens.

Morgan- (From across the room) Hey beefcake! Haul your shanks over here.

Eric- Gotta run.

He dashes over to Morgan pursued by Miles and his camera.

Int. Spellman living room. Sabrina and Hilda sit on the settee with Sabrina’s mom, who’s still very much a ball of wax, between them while Zelda serves tea and cake.

Diana- Zelda, this bunt cake is fabulous!

Zelda- Thank you.

Diana- Where do you find beetle parts that are so moist?

Zelda- Er, those are raisins.

Sabrina- I think mom’s been living in the Peruvian mountains a little too long.

Hilda- I must say, Diana, you look great... I mean, you know... considering.

Diana- Thanks Hilda.

Sabrina- I can’t believe the Witches Council could do something so horrible to you just for bearing a witches child!

Diana- What’s most painful is not being able to be a part of my daughters life.

Zelda- You know, that Witches Council is just a bunch of evil, passive-aggressive, control freaks! Although I must say, that Bert Schlagel is a doll.

Sabrina- Could he help us get mom back to her pre paraffin self?

Zelda- I don’t know.

Hilda- Oh come on! That guy can do anything. He got you house seats to Anne Bolin’s beheading.

Zelda- Well there’s no harm in going down there and asking.

They all get up, Sabrina picks up her mom.

Zelda- (Cont.) And I’ll bring the bunt cake. Bert’s an usher.

Salem- Hey! While we’re there, maybe the Witches Council will find it in their hearts to show me some mercy?

Sabrina- Hmm. Innocent mother desperate to see her daughter – Fascist cat who tried to take over the world? Yeah, you’ve got a shot.

Salem- <Sob! Sob! Sob!>

Int. Witches Council waiting room. The Spellman’s arrive in a large swirl of sparkles. They sit down in the chintz chairs around the coffee table.

Hilda- Oh-oh, I’m so nervous!

Zelda- Oh everyone relax. I know how to schmoose these old geezers. I’m sure they’ll show us some mercy.

Voice from the council chamber- (OS) Oh no! Please not that! Aaaaaargghhh!

Hilda- See ya.

She gets up to leave but Sabrina gets in her way.

Sabrina- Aunt Hilda. We didn’t come all this way just to be scared off by a couple of blood curdling screams.

The council door opens and the bailiff enters.

Bailiff- The council will see you now.

Harnessing her courage, Hilda picks up Salem, Sabrina picks up Diana and Zelda picks up the bunt cake and the follow the bailiff into the chamber.

Sabrina- (To her mom) Well here goes.

Diana- How’s my lipstick?

Sabrina- Perfect, it matches your forehead.

Int. Council chamber. They all traipse in to see a group of young men and women sat in a semi circle with a fantastic backdrop of clouds behind them.

Zelda- (To the bailiff) Excuse me, but I believe you’ve brought us to the wrong room.

Hilda- Yeah. We wanted to see the Witches Council, not the freshman class of just-out-of-diapers university.

Chief Council Member- This is the Witches Council.

Hilda & Zelda- (Together) What?!

Female Council Member- Can I beverage you?

Hilda, Zelda & Sabrina- (Together) No thank you.

Salem- Lemonade! Shaken, not stirred.

With a point there’s a glass of lemonade beside Salem.

Sabrina- What happened to the old Witches Council?

Chief Council Member- They were old; they were put out to pasture.

Male Council Member- Literally.

Chief Council Member- Can we get on with the business at hand? I have a twelve thirty lunch thing.

Salem- I’d like to speak first. Eh-hem! As a former wrong doer...

Sabrina, Hilda & Zelda- (Together) Shut up!

Salem- Ghe?!

Sabrina- (Stepping forward) I’m here because I feel that my mother, who was turned into a ball of wax by the old Witches Council, has been unfairly punished. Although the old Witches Council thought my mother had committed a crime, I feel this whole wax thing is just... unjust! I, therefore, respectfully request that you turn my mother back into... my mom.

The council had been sat listening with looks of utter boredom and disinterest and seemed a little surprised when Sabrina stopped speaking.

Chief Council Member- Yeah, that’s a really interesting notion but I don’t know, I’m-I’m just not responding to it.

Female Council Member- Maybe it’s me, but er, it doesn’t seem that there’s that much at stake here.

Sabrina- Not that much at stake?! I-I’m trying to bring my mother back to life here!

Zelda- Excuse me, but we are talking about a mother and her child!

Hilda- Zelda and I have done our best raising Sabrina, but nothing can replace a mothers love!

Diana- That’s why I came back and took this chance, because I wanted so much to be a part of my daughters life.

Sabrina- And that’s really hard when she looks like something that came off a Christmas clearance isle.

Salem- Can I talk now?

Hilda, Sabrina & Zelda- (Together) No!

Chief Council Member- Sabrina, we can’t undo the old decree but there are a few other options.

Sabrina- (Hopeful) Options are good.

Chief Council Member- We can turn your mom into a throw pillow, a Pashmina scarf, or... a glass eye.

Sabrina- Options stink!

Int. Spellman living room. The Spellman’s and Saberhagen’s return.

Sabrina- (Angry) I can’t believe that stupid Witches Council! Y’know I asked them to make you human again and-and the best they could come up with was a glass eye?

Salem- You said no awfully quick. You could have at least heard the colours.

Hilda- Sabrina, I am not going to take this lying down. I’m going to scour every magic book on this planet until I find a solution.

Zelda- And I’m going to traipse through every pasture in the Other Realm until I find Bert Schlagel.

They leave.

Sabrina- (Calling after) And what’s mom supposed to do? Wax down a few surfboards?

Diana- Sabrina, it’s okay. Just ‘cause I’m wax doesn’t mean we can’t spend some quality time together. Introduce me to your life. Show me everything that goes on in your world.

Sabrina- (Perking up) Okay! And then, afterwards, you can show me everything that goes on… in… your... (Perking down) Never mind.

She picks up Diana’s wax head and heads out to the door.

Int. College house. Sabrina enters with the large wax ball that is her mom. None of her roommates are around.

Sabrina- Well here we are, home sweet home.

Diana- (Muffled) Oh it’s lovely sweetheart but I could see it much better if you turned me right side up.

Sabrina- Oh oop!

She turns her mom over and puts her down on the table as Harvey comes down from Morgan’s room laden with clothes.

Sabrina- (Cont.) Hey Harvey, I’d like you to meet my mom.

Diana- Hi Harvey.

Harvey- Wow, I can really see the resemblance.

Sabrina- Oh, we get that all the time.

Harvey- Er a pleasure meeting you.

He dashes for the door.

Harvey- (Cont.)(Under his breath) I got out o’ that family just in time!

He leaves as Morgan comes down talking on her cell phone with her shadow, Miles, still filming her every move.

Morgan- (On phone) Marissa, I don’t care what the doctor said, that mole is staying right where it is until after you’ve modelled the butterfly blouse!

She hangs up and turns round. She jerks back in disgust.

Morgan- (Cont.) Sabrina, what is that hideous ball of wax on the table?

Sabrina- (Protectively) Hey! That’s no ball of wax; that’s my... candle.

‘Island in the sun’ by Weezer plays through the following.

Ext. Adams College campus. A sunny day, a mother and daughter enjoying a picnic lunch on the grass. They chat and laugh and passing strangers look at the pretty, blonde loony talking to a ball of wax. The pretty, blonde loony glares at them until they go away.

Int. Hilda’s Coffee House. Ignoring more strange looks, Sabrina holds a cup of foaming latte to Diana’s wax lips… Oooh! Do you remember them? Wax lips, didn’t they taste foul? … and dabs the excess foam away.

Ext. The streets of Westbridge. Sabrina pedals her mom around on a bicycle made for two.

Int. Photo-booth. The pair pose for series of snaps before heading back on their tandem.

Int. The City Desk office of the Boston Citizen. Sabrina brings her wax ball to see where she works. Fade music.

Sabrina- And this is the newspaper where I work and, y’know, sometimes just look like I’m working.

She puts her mom down on the large conference table. There doesn’t appear to be anyone else around.

Diana- Honey, I am so proud of you.

Sabrina- Thanks. You know, your support really means a lot to me.

She picks Diana up and holds her face to face as Josh enters unnoticed.

Sabrina- …!

Josh- (Interrupting) Hey Sabrina!

Sabrina- (Turning surprised) Josh! Hi!

He gives her a peck on the cheek.

Josh- What are you doing here? With er a ball of wax?

Sabrina- I er I just came by to wax this table.

She rubs Diana up and down the table a little.

Josh- Okay... but just so you know, they make that in a spray.

Sabrina- Oh I know. I just wanted to use this up first.

Josh- Right. Okay, I-I’ll talk to you later.

He leaves and Sabrina holds Diana up so she can watch him go.

Sabrina- That’s my boyfriend.

Diana- He’s adorable! (Winking) He’s got my votive.

Sabrina- (Laughing) Mom!

She gives her mom a companionable nudge but forgetting that she’s a ball of wax and Diana rolls off the table. Sabrina dives sliding over the freshly waxed table trying to catch her.

Int. College house. The house is full of models, male and female, Morgan, who is ironing beside the table and, of course, Miles. He’s right in Morgan’s face with his camera and the red head is beginning to feel the strain.

Morgan- Miles, I can’t iron with that lens in my face!

Miles- I am sorry! I have a cinematic duty to capture every second of your complete emotional breakdown.

Morgan throws a freshly ironed sock at him.

Miles- (Cont.) That’s good. More of that.

She throws the boot that the sock goes with.

Miles- (Cont.) Oof! Less of that!

Ingrid- Morgan, can you come here a second? I’m having trouble with my zipper.

Morgan- You pull the little tab up.

Ingrid- It won’t go.

Morgan- I guess if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.

She walks over and takes the zip on the models bodice.

Morgan- (Cont.) I hate that!

Ingrid- I don’t know what the problem is.

Morgan- (Tugging) I’ll tell you what the problem is. This zipper is trying to squeeze it’s way around five pounds of fresh fat! <Gasp!> Have you gained weight?!

Ingrid- (Guiltily) No! No! All I’ve eaten for a week are Hilda’s fat-free lattes and muffins.

Morgan sighs and turns to find one of the male models with a decided list to starboard.

Morgan- Eric! Stand up straight. You look like a goose neck lamp!

Sabrina enters with a large ball of wax.

Sabrina- We’re back!

She sees the house full.

Sabrina- (Cont.) I mean, hey everybody.

She puts Diana down on the table beside the ironing board.

Sabrina- (Cont.) I mean, I can’t wait for this fashion show to be over.

Eric- That makes seven of us.

Morgan- Oh is that so? And I guess a year from now when you’re posing for magazine covers, you’ll be rueing the day I ever made you a fashion model?

Sabrina- I don’t think you heard him correctly, they’re rueing you know.

Ingrid- It’s been non-stop abuse ever since we took this gig.

Morgan- Well here’s a thought. Un-take it! Nobody’s stopping you.

She stops tugging at the zipper and stands with her arms folded.

Ingrid- (To Female models #2 & #3) Fine?

Female Models #2 & #3- Fine!

All the models- (To Morgan) Fine!

Eric- We’re out o’ here!

They all leave.

Morgan- (Calling after) Go ahead! Who needs you?

She storms off upstairs to her room. Miles films the last of the models closing the door after himself. Morgan comes running back down stairs in a total panic.

Morgan- (Cont.) Oh my God! I do!

Sabrina- Morgan, the show is tomorrow!

Morgan- What have I done?! Sabrina, this show means everything to me. Designing clothes is the only thing I have a real talent for! Except curling my eyelashes in a moving car, but I can’t make a living doing that.

Miles- (Still filming) Not to push but it’d really help the scene dramatically if you cried right now. Go.

Morgan angrily covers the lens with a piece of sparkly fabric.

Sabrina- Morgan, if you plan to succeed in any profession, you’re going to have to learn to treat people with respect!

Morgan- Fine! But first, I need people!

There’s the sound of a car starting up outside.

Sabrina- Come on, maybe we can get them back.

They all run for the door, Miles still filming leaving Diana on the table beside the ironing board.

Diana- (To herself) Is it hot in here, or is it just me?

She glances sideways but can’t quite see the still switched on iron beside her.

Int. College house, later. Morgan and Sabrina come back inside. Sabrina sees Diana, the rather flat melted pancake of wax on the table and is horrified.

Sabrina- Oh my God! This is horrible!

She tries to carefully peel her mom from the table.

Morgan- I know! Why did I have to tell Marissa that her back fat was wiggling? Where am I going to find new models by tomorrow?

She runs off upstairs to her room in a panic.

Sabrina- Mom, are you here? It’s Sabrina your idiot daughter who stuck you next to a steam iron! Jeez, what have I done? We were just getting to know each other too. Now I’ve lost you forever!

She peels the pile of molten wax up and lays it back down on the table, tears welling in her eyes.

Sabrina- (Cont.) Mom, I’m so sorry.

A single tear runs down her cheek and falls hitting the mound of wax. Sabrina has to jump back quickly as the wax swells on the table and bursts apart leaving Diana sat there looking bemused.

Sabrina- (Cont.) (Stunned) Mom. How did...?

Diana- I don’t have a clue!

And they fall into each others arms.

Diana- (Cont.)(Laughing) Oh sweetheart!

The a large puff of smoke beside them and they both turn to see Hilda and Zelda appear from within it carrying the magic book.

Hilda- Sabrina, great news! I’ve just found out that if you melt the wax and mix it with your tears... (Spots Diana) Oh, I guess you’ve figured it out. Great, but there’s one more thing… Don’t look at each other!

Zelda- Turn around, quick!

She jumps between them and pushes Diana round so she’s facing away from Sabrina. Hilda does the same to Sabrina.

Zelda- (Cont.) Sabrina, listen. If your mother turns into another ball of wax, nothing will ever bring her back, ever.

Sabrina- But what if I...?

Hilda- (Interrupting) No.

Sabrina- And not even if I...?

Hilda- (Interrupting) No.

Sabrina- How about if I...?

Zelda- (Interrupting) No. Sabrina, I’m sorry.

Sabrina, who had been so happy only moments before is reduced to tears of misery once more. Zelda comforts her.

Zelda- (Cont.) Oh honey, If I could, I would trade all my magic so you and your mother could be together.

Sabrina- Thanks aunt Zelda.

Diana- Don’t cry darling. We’ll do what we’ve always done. We’ll write, call.

Hilda- And who knows, with the turn over rate at the Witches Council, pretty soon we can appeal to a whole new group of idiots.

Diana- Sabrina, I promise you, we will always be in each others lives.

They both reach back and take one another’s hands.

Sabrina- I love you, mom.

Diana- I love you too, sweetheart.

Int. Hilda’s Coffee House. Sabrina takes a break from work and sits with Roxie and Josh. Harvey sits by the counter waiting for Morgan while Miles stands agitated with his video camera in his arms.

Miles- I need an ending for my film! Is Morgan aware that, by firing those models, she’s damaged her career and mine? (On their (lack of) response) Are you listening?

He leaves in a huff as Harvey comes over to join them.

Josh- (Amazed) Morgan couldn’t get those models to come back?

Harvey- No. She even told Eric she’d name a purse after him. Nothing.

Sabrina- I know this is an unpopular position, but I feel kinda bad for Morgan.

Roxie- Her clothes are really great. (On Sabrina’s look) Okay! There was a cute sweater sitting on the couch, I tried it on, Sue me!

Sabrina- I tried it on too. I mean, normally I don’t look good in raglan sleeves but that sweater; Hoo-Haa!

Roxie- Hoo-Haa!

Harvey- You know, Morgan is pretty persuasive, I’m sure she find some other models to fill in.

Sabrina- (With a sparkle in her eye) I can almost guarantee it.

Int. College Hall. A lighting rig stands over a catwalk surrounded on all sides by the fashion elite… and, of course, Hilda and Zelda Spellman. The music starts and camera’s flash as the first model walks onto the catwalk. Walk is something of an exaggeration as what Roxie actually does is stomp on and as quickly as is humanly possible stomps back off again. She passes, on her way, Morgan who seems to be in a dream world as she looks up at the lighting rig above her head. The audience frown and glance at each other. Sabrina shoves her to one side as she comes on and walks with a huge smile the length of the catwalk. She gives her aunts a little wave and turns inelegantly scratching herself and pulling at her skirt as though her knickers are riding up. She gets off as quickly as she can.

Zelda- Okay, so Sabrina will never be a supermodel.

Hilda- And all those years of supermodel lessons, out the window.

Now it’s the boys turn and Miles is first. He comes on so terrified he’s hyperventilating and faints full length on the catwalk. Hilda and Zelda make to help him but he jumps back up before they can and crawls from the hall.

Zelda- (To Hilda) And then there’s Miles.

Josh comes on stiff as a board and stands there turning and flapping his arms about.

Hilda- (Sarcastic) Well he’s a natural.

Harvey sneaks to corner of the stage, looks out at the audience and sneaks shyly back off again.

Int. College Hall, Back stage. Among racks of clothes and piles of make up, Morgan’s having a freak out while still changing her outfit.

Morgan- This is a disaster! I’m ruined! No, I’m worse than ruined. I’m going to spend my life making soy mocha chinos!

Sabrina- Hold on. You know we still have eveningwear... and I have a feeling thing’s’ll go a lot better this time.

She gives her finger a little twirl and it’s tip sparkles discretely.

Int. College Hall. Roxie rocks onto the catwalk, hips swaying, smiling confidently and showing off Morgan’s outfit with style. The applause is deafening. Morgan sashes on next with tall elegance, the cheers don’t let up as Sabrina follows her looking, if not tall and elegant, then definitely short and elegant in a pink Morgan creation. She gives a pose before she leaves the stage to Miles, whose lost his geekishness along with his nerves and struts his stuff the length of the catwalk.

Hilda- (To Zelda) You know, the neurotic one’s kinda cute when he’s all gussied up.

Josh has the girls all a quiver when he gives them the over the shoulder look and twirls his jacket before leaving the finale to Harvey drags his jacket along the floor with all trace of shyness gone. The crowd erupts into chants of Morgan! Morgan! Morgan! And Miles leads the models back onto the catwalk walking backwards with his video camera to his eye so he can capture Morgan’s triumphal entry on the shoulders of Josh and Harvey. Sabrina and Roxie bring up the rear to a standing ovation.

Later. Sabrina, still in her pink Morgan original, is with her aunts.

Zelda- You did great, sweetheart, but, technically, you should not have used your pointing finger to make Morgan look good.

Sabrina- I know, but Morgan’s really talented and I wanted people to see that.

Hilda- Good one! Way to find a loophole.

Sabrina gives her a sad smile which Zelda notices.

Zelda- what’s wrong sweetheart?

Sabrina- Oh, I just wish my mother could have been here to see me.

Diana- (OS) Sabrina.

She turns just in time to catch a glimpse of a dark figure flit behind a curtain. The sadness remains in Sabrina’s heart.

Int. Hilda’s Coffee House. All the usual suspects are present as Morgan reads the review from the paper under the ever watchful lens of Miles’ camera.

Morgan- (Reading) "Miss Cavanaugh’s line of clothing which is very forward directional" (Excited) Directional! "Texturally mind blowing will certainly establish her as one of fashions rising young stars."!

Everyone claps, pleased for her.

Sabrina- You know, reviews don’t get any better than that.

Morgan- Neither do friends. Thanks for all your help everybody. It worked out perfectly (To Hilda) Oh, by the way, You are going to have to be a little more lenient with my work schedule now that I am a budding, superstar designer.

Hilda- I am behind you one hundred percent, and to show you my support, I made you a couple of my double chocolate fat-free cream pies.

She puts the two pies on the counter and they’re clearly made from pure cellulite. Morgan is overcome with gratitude. She takes a finger full

Morgan- Hmm, I don’t know how you do it.

She takes one of the pies over to her friends and they all dive in.

Hilda- (Under her breath) When you try to get into that skirt in two weeks you’ll know.

Run Credits.