The Melissa Zone news :: pictures :: forums :: and more :: the ultimate Melissa Joan Hart fan site ::
Sabrina The Teenage Witch - View Transcript

Meeting Dad’s Girlfriend

Teleplay By - Scovell, Nell
Story By - Bull, Sheldon & Scovell, Nell
Transcribed By - Booth Paul

Cast

Sabrina - Hart, Melissa Joan
Hilda - Rhea, Caroline
Zelda - Broderick, Beth
Salem - Bakay, Nick
Harvey - Richert, Nate
Edward - Benson, Robby
Gail - Fernetz, Charlene
Walker, James T - O’Brien, Patrick T

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the characters in this transcript, nor do I own any rights to the television show Sabrina, the Teenage Witch. It was created by Nell Scovell and belongs to her, Viacom Productions Inc, Hartbreak Films, and the ABC Television network. The characters are based on the original characters appearing in Archie Comics.

 

Int. Spellman Kitchen. Sabrina strains and struggles against insurmountable odds.

Sabrina- Grrr!

Hilda- Sabrina, are you growling like a bear?

Sabrina- I can't get this jar open.

Hilda takes the jar from her.

Hilda- I'll do it, it's all in the wrist. Uhrgh! Oh man, that's on tight.

Sabrina- It looks like they're afraid the spaghetti sauce'll fall into the wrong hands.

Sabrina tries again without success as Zelda enters.

Zelda- What's up?

Sabrina- I can't get this jar open.

Zelda- Oh, don't you know the trick?

She takes the jar and taps the lid on the counter.

Zelda- Here, you whack it lightly to break the seal and there. uer!!

Sabrina- See? It's not so easy.

Zelda- Well then, use magic.

Zelda puts the jar down on the table.

Hilda- Good idea. The finger is mightier than the wrist.

Sabrina points and the jar begins to spin at great speed as the unleashed forces, capable of shattering worlds, do their work on the screw top.

Sabrina- That should do it.

She twists the top,

Sabrina- (Cont.) Uurgh! what is wrong with this jar?! I give up.

She walks off in a huff.

Zelda- (To Hilda) You know it's great having supernatural powers but for some things, we could really use a man around the house.

Run opening credits.

Int. Sabrina's bedroom. Sabrina's getting ready for school and talking to her magic book, or rather to figure 3b in her magic book, her father, Edward.

Edward- I'll be there around dinner time. Anything special you wanna do this weekend?

Sabrina- Maybe we could go to the ice show.

Edward- If that's what you want.

Sabrina- And maybe we can invite Harvey?

Edward- What a great idea.

Sabrina- O-ho! That sounded too enthusiastic, forget I said anything.

Edward- Come on, I really wanna meet him.

Sabrina- Okay but you can't make a big deal out of it.

Edward- I won't, it'll just be a casual meeting between a father and his daughters first serious boyfriend.

Sabrina- I'm glad you understand. I gotta get to school.

Edward- Bye sweetheart.

Sabrina- See ya.

She kisses his photo in the book and closes it.

Int. Spellman kitchen. Zelda and Hilda are having breakfast at the table, Sabrina comes down stairs and grabs a slice of toast.

Zelda- Morning.

Hilda- You're running late.

Sabrina- Dad and I were trying to figure out our weekend plans. D'you guys wanna go to the ice show tomorrow?

Zelda- Oh I don't think so.

Sabrina- There will be little flash lights.

Hilda- Definitely not.

Sabrina- Okay, then it's just me, dad and Harvey.

Zelda- Harvey and Ted are meeting? You didn't say that.

Hilda- Now that's a show worth seeing.

Sabrina- Too bad, you already said no.

She takes a bite of her toast and leaves to catch her bus.

Int. Westbridge High School Hallway. Sabrina is with Harvey at his locker, Harvey's feeling a little uncomfortable.

Harvey- That'll be fine, I'd love to meet your father. Oh man, I should have worn an under shirt.

Sabrina- I promise you two will get along great.

Harvey- Does he like sports?

Sabrina- No.

Harvey- Does he know anything about cars?

Sabrina- No.

Harvey- Military aircraft?

Sabrina- Look, I'm sure you'll find something to talk about.

Harvey- We could talk about you.

Sabrina- No!

Ext. Spellman back porch Salem sits in his favourite sunny spot as Sabrina walks right by him.

Salem- Fine, don't say hi.

Sabrina- Sorry Salem, I'm just so excited about seeing my dad.

Salem- Has it been a month already?

Sabrina- Yeah.

Salem- But today's Tuesday right?

Sabrina- No, Friday.

She carries on into the house.

Salem- Man, I was way off.

Int. Spellman kitchen. Sabrina enters to find Hilda concentrating hard. Zelda watches.

Sabrina- Is dad here yet?

Zelda- No.

Sabrina- What's going on?

Zelda- Hilda's still trying to open that jar of spaghetti sauce.

The table spins one way, the jar the other. She finishes the spell and picks up the jar.

Hilda- Oh, I think I've got it this time, Watch... Don't watch.

Zelda- Give it up. Ted will be here soon and he'll open it.

Hilda- Why, because he's a man?

Zelda- Well yes.

Hilda- That is so sexist.

Zelda- They happen to have more upper body strength...

Hilda- Oh, just because he's a man...

Zelda- ... that is not to say that...

Hilda- ... doesn't mean...

A deep grating voice echoes loudly round the kitchen silencing the arguing aunts and sending a shiver of dread down their spines.

Edward- That's enough out of both of you!

Edward comes down the stairs.

Edward- (Cont.) Don't make me use the voice

Sabrina- Dad, you made it.

Edward- (In his normal voice) Hi Sabrina.

They hug each other.

Zelda- Hello Ted.

Zelda gives her brother a hug.

Hilda- Oh I hate that voice, it sounds just like father.

She too gives her brother a warm hug.

Edward- I know, it's terrifying! Sometimes I even scare myself. Here, this is for you.

He hands his present to Sabrina.

Sabrina- What is it?

Edward- It's a magic camera, takes photo's instantly.

Sabrina- You mean like a Polaroid?

Edward- We had the technology first. Try it.

Sabrina- Okay, well you guys stand together.

He gets together with his sisters and Sabrina takes the photo. The flash is like a supernova leaving the subjects blinking and blinded.

Sabrina- Did the flash work?

Zelda, Hilda and Edward- (Together) Yes.

Int. Spellman kitchen later. Edward strains and struggles against insurmountable odds.

Edward- Uuurgh! almost.

Sabrina- You've been working on that jar for two hours.

Hilda- See? Men aren't stronger, they just keep trying longer than any sane woman would.

The top comes off.

Edward- Ah, there.

Zelda- Just in time for dinner. Who wants spaghetti?

Hilda- Not me, I'm mad at Italian food.

Int. Spellman dining room. Hilda leads the little procession of Spellman's in.

Hilda- I don't know what I'm in the mood for.

Sabrina- I feel like Chinese.

Hilda- Good idea.

Edward- It's on me.

With a snap of his fingers there's not only a sumptuous Chinese banquet spread across the table but Chinese decor fills the room, Chinese flute music fills the air and they're all dressed in finest Chinese silk kimono's and dresses.

Sabrina- (Speaking Chinese) It looks delicious.

Zelda- (Speaking Chinese) And smells so aromatic.

Edward- (Speaking Chinese) Try the Peking Duck.

Hilda- (Speaking Chinese) I can't understand a word you are saying.

Later as the meal is just about finished.

Sabrina- (Speaking Chinese) And the Yak said 'Three days!'

They all laugh at Sabrina's joke.

Edward- (Speaking Chinese) I'm stuffed. Who wants ice cream?

Sabrina, Hilda and Zelda- (Speaking Chinese)(Together) I do! I do!

Sabrina- (Speaking Chinese) I'll see what Salem wants.

Int. Spellman upstairs landing. Salem is resting in one of his favourite resting spots, On top of the linen basket. Sabrina comes up.

Sabrina- (Speaking Chinese) Salem, do you want ice cream?

Salem- Speak English!

Sabrina- Oh!

She points at herself reverting her clothes and language to normal.

Sabrina- Sorry. We're going out for ice cream, do you want some?

Salem- I shouldn't, but me down for a double scoop of pralines and cream.

Sabrina- Got it.

She starts back down stairs but hears a knocking sound coming from her bedroom.

Sabrina- (Cont.) What's that?

Int. Sabrina's bedroom. Sabrina comes in to find that the knocking is coming from the magic book. She opens it up and it falls open at the picture of a woman in a smart business suit.

Sabrina- Hello?

Gail- Hi, you must be Sabrina.

Sabrina- Who are you?

Gail- I'm a friend of your fathers, my names Gail. Is he home?

Sabrina- Yeah, hold on, I'll take you to him.

She picks up the book and leaves.

Int. Spellman living room. Everyone's getting coats on to go out for ice cream as Sabrina comes down stairs with the book.

Sabrina- Dad, someone in the book wants to talk to you.

Edward- Who?

Sabrina- I think she said her names Gail.

Edward- Oh, I'll take it.

He takes the book and carries it into the living room.

Edward- (To Gail) Hey.

Gail- Hi sweetheart, I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time?

Edward- No, not at all. So what's up? I thought you were in court today?

Gail- Oh I was until Drell disintegrated the judge, so we adjourned for the weekend.

Edward- That's great.

Gail- I was hoping maybe I could join you?

Edward- Hold on, I'll check.

He closes the book and turns to the curious aunts and the very curious Sabrina.

Zelda- Busted.

Hilda- Who's Gail?

Sabrina- Figure 4b?

Edward- Actually she's more than that. Gail is my... girlfriend.

Sabrina- You have a girlfriend! since when?

Edward- We've been seeing each other for about ten months.

Sabrina- Does mom know about this?

Edward- Honey, your mom and I have been divorced for six years.

Sabrina- It has not been six years, I was ten when you got divorced, I'm sixteen now, that would make it... Six years.

Edward- So would you like to meet her?

Zelda- I would.

Hilda- Me too.

Sabrina- Sure, why not.

Edward- Great, you're going to really like her. I've been waiting for just the right time to bring her around and well, I guess this is it.

He puts the book on the book stand.

Edward- (Cont.) Come on out honey.

Gail- Stand back.

Figure 4b leaps from the page and lands deftly on her feet. She rubs her hips.

Gail- Those margins are tight.

Gail and Edward hug each other.

Edward- Gail, this is Hilda, Zelda and my Sabrina.

Gail- It's so good to finally meet everyone, I've heard so much about you.

Hilda- Well we've heard nothing about you, so we'll ask all the questions.

She takes Gail's arm and drags her off for ice cream and interrogation.

Int. The ice cream bar. Sabrina, Edward and Gail sit on one side of the table, Hilda and Zelda on the other. Hilda holds up Sabrina's camera.

Hilda- Smile.

The flash goes of blinding the three opposite.

Gail- Whoa! I think I blinked.

Sabrina- I think the whole block blinked.

Hilda- It's a good one of you Ted.

Edward- Let me see.

They look at the picture of themselves and there's a sudden sparkle on Edward's smiling teeth and a pinging sound..

Edward- Wow, can't remember the last time I pinged in a photo.

Zelda- So Gail, you were just about to tell us how you and Ted met.

Gail- Actually it's very funny. See, every year the book has a blood drive. Well I always give because I'm E negative, which is kind of rare. So, just as the nurse sticks me she points to Ted on the next cot and tells me he's E negative too. Well, I just couldn't resist turning to him and blurting out...

Sabrina- (Interrupting) I got an 'A' in my history test.

Edward- That's great Sabrina.

Hilda- Yes, it's wonderful but I want to hear the rest of Gail's story.

Sabrina- (To Gail) Oh, sorry.

Gail- That's okay.

Zelda- So what did you say?

Gail- I said, 'I guess you're my type.'

Everyone just looks at her not getting it until she explains.

Gail- (Cont.) Because of the E negative thing.

Hilda- Oh right! Blood.

Zelda- Very clever.

But Sabrina had effectively killed the story.

Sabrina- Oh look, here's our ice cream.

The waiter hands out the goodies.

Sabrina- (Cont.) Did you ever notice how these sundae's have strata? They do, see there's a layer of hot fudge, a layer of ice cream and then more hot fudge. I guess 'cause mom's an archaeologist I notice stuff like that.

Zelda- That's fascinating.

Sabrina- And delicious.

Gail- Well that looks incredible.

Edward- Oh, d'you wanna bite?

Gail- Oh well, maybe just a taste.

Edward- Here, have some.

He takes the hot fudge sundae that he and Sabrina are sharing and lets Gail have a spoon full.

Sabrina- That's enough!

She snatches it back.

Edward- Sabrina, we're sharing.

Sabrina- She has coffee.

Edward- I think there's plenty for all of us.

Sabrina- No there's not. I mean maybe there's enough ice cream and maybe there's enough whipped cream but there's only two layers of hot fudge and that is not enough.

Edward- Then I'll tell you what. We'll get you your own.

Hilda- (To Zelda) Oh no, he's gonna use the voice.

Sabrina- I don't want my own.

Gail- Sabrina, I didn't come here to steal you hot fudge, Really I only wanted a bite.

Sabrina- Just a bite?

Gail- Yes.

Sabrina- Oh well, that's okay. Do you want the cherry, I don't like em.

Int. Spellman living room. The gang return from the ice cream parlour.

Hilda- And the monster fun weekend continues. Who's up for charades?

Zelda- I am, as long as I'm not on Hilda's team.

Edward- Same here.

Gail- Well I'll be on your team Hilda, and Sabrina?

Sabrina- I'll pass. I'm just going to bring Salem his ice cream and then I've gotta do some homework.

Edward- It's Friday night.

Sabrina- You know kids, we love our homework. Gotta go.

She runs off upstairs.

Zelda- She's taking this hard.

Hilda- And covering so well.

Gail- Maybe I should go.

Edward- No, I'll just go have a talk with her.

Int. Spellman upstairs landing. Salem sits on his linen basket, Sabrina comes up with his ice cream.

Sabrina- Here cat, pig out.

She dumps the bag on his basket and goes straight into her room.

Salem- Hey, you have to open the bag, I can't...

The bedroom door bangs shut. A few seconds later Edward comes up the stairs.

Salem- Oh Ted, fantastic. Listen, could you...

Edward- (Interrupting) Not now Salem.

He goes into Sabrina's room.

Salem- <Sob>

Int. Sabrina's bedroom. Sabrina sits in her armchair with her knees drawn up as her father enters.

Edward- Sabrina, I think we need to talk.

Sabrina- About what?

Edward- Your problem with Gail.

Sabrina- I don't have a problem with Gail.

Edward- Then she can come with us to the ice show tomorrow?

Sabrina- Absolutely not!

Edward- See? There is a problem. Honey, I know it's hard for you to accept a new woman in my life but I have to move on. We all have to move on.

Sabrina- Okay, but before you do, just remember mom'll be getting her Ph.D soon and maybe the two of you could get teaching jobs together at a small collage near a big City, Villa Nova would be perfect.

Edward- That's a very sweet, detailed thought, that's not gonna happen.

Sabrina- How about Miami of Ohio?

Edward- No. Now I want you to do me a favour and come down stairs and give Gail a chance. Can you do that?

Sabrina- Okay, but only because I'm a really big person.

They get up and head for the door.

Edward- Oh great, and you can be on aunt Hilda's team for Charades.

Sabrina- Noooo!

Int. Upstairs landing. Salem has managed to rip open the bag and has his face stuck deep inside and Sabrina and her father come out.

Salem- Oh this is good. This is so good.

Int. Living room. Hilda and Zelda have entertained their guest while waiting for Edward and Sabrina by digging out one of the family photo albums. The three women sit on the settee laughing.

Zelda- I mean did powdered wigs look good on anyone?

Edward and Sabrina come down the stairs.

Edward- We're back.

Hilda- Just in time, here's Ted in a kilt.

Edward turns on the voice.

Edward- Put the photo album down!

All three women cringe and do as they're told.

Edward- (Cont.) Now, let's all sit and chat.

Gail- About what?

Sabrina- Well actually I'd like to hear more about you, Gail.

Gail- You would?

Sabrina- Yeah.

Gail- What do you wanna know?

Sabrina- I wasn't really paying attention before so um, let's start at the beginning, erm. You're a lawyer right?

Gail- Right.

Sabrina- And you and my dad have been going out how long?

Gail- About a year.

Sabrina- So d'you think you'll get married?

Edward- No.

Gail- Yes. Did you say no?

Edward- Yes. Didn't you?

Gail- No.

Edward- You said yes?

Gail- Yes.

Edward- When I said no?

Gail- Yes.

Edward- That's not good.

Gail- No.

Edward- Are you upset?

Gail- Yes.

Edward- Would you like to talk?

Gail- No.

Edward- I think we should.

Hilda and Zelda- (Together) Yes.

Gail- Okay, I know we've never discussed this but I thought marriage was where we were heading.

Edward- Not me. Gail, you know I've done the marriage thing.

Gail- Well I haven't and I'd like to.

She walks over to the Magic book and starts flipping through it.

Edward- What are you doing?

Gail- Just looking for a page. I think I need some time to re-evaluate everything we've ever said to each other. Good bye.

She dives headlong into the book.

Edward- (Calling after) Gail! (To his sisters) What do I do?

Hilda- Go after her.

Zelda- Quickly.

Edward takes a running dive into the book, but comes flying out again within seconds.

Edward- She wants to be alone.

Sabrina walks over and closes the book on Gail.

Sabrina- So, who's up for charades?

Int. Spellman kitchen the next day. Sabrina comes down ready for her day out at the ice show.

Sabrina- What smells so funny?

Zelda- Your dad was up a lot last night and I guess he thought he'd be helpful by opening every jar in the house.

Hilda- Would you like sweet gerkins for breakfast?

Sabrina- Not really. So is dad still sleeping?

Edward- Nope.

He comes down stairs still in his pyjamas.

Edward- (Cont.) Not now; Not ever.

Sabrina- Dad, what about the ice show, you're not dressed.

Edward- Isn't it casual?

Sabrina- Not that casual.

Edward- No problem, I'll change.

The front door bell rings.

Sabrina- Quickly, Harvey's here.

She dashes off to answer the door.

Int. Spellman living room. Sabrina opens the door to let Harvey in. He's really made an effort to impress.

Sabrina- Hey.

Harvey- Hi.

Sabrina- Wow, you got all dressed up.

Harvey- I wanted to make a good impression on your dad. Is it too much?

Sabrina- Well he may ask you to do his taxes. Did you put stuff in your hair?

Harvey- No! Yes.

Edward enters from the kitchen fully dressed.

Edward- You must be Harvey.

Harvey- I must.

Sabrina- This is my dad.

Edward- Nice to meet you.

Harvey- Nice to meet you.

The shake hands.

Sabrina- Oh I forgot my camera, I'll be right back. You guys get to know each other.

She goes off for her camera. The uncomfortable silence last until she gets back.

Sabrina- All set?

Harvey- Yeah.

Edward- Let's go.

Sabrina- Hey if we have time maybe we could stop by the arcade.

Int. The Arcade. 'Barely Breathing' by Duncan Sheik plays as Harvey sinks a basket and turns to high five Sabrina. Sabrina sinks hers and high five's her father. Edward Sinks his but there's no one there for him to high five with.

Sabrina thumps the alligators, Harvey has a go also. Edward casually whops the gators as they show their heads but his attacks grow more frenzied and vicious

Hot dogs all round at the stall, Ted pumps ketchup onto his. He pumps and pumps his mind in another realm until Sabrina notices his hand is covered in ketchup.

Sabrina takes a photo of Harvey and her dad stood together. The music fades.

Int. The ice show. Harvey and Sabrina sit in the audience. Sabrina twirls her flash light on a string.

Sabrina- These little flash lights were more fun when I was five.

Harvey- Wow, Katarina Witt is really beautiful.

Sabrina does a little jealous pointing and there's a 'Oooh!' from the crowd, Harvey winces.

Harvey- (Cont.) Ooh! that had to hurt.

Sabrina- This is fun.

Harvey- I don't think your dad's having too good a time.

Sabrina- What d'ya mean?

Harvey- Well he sunk all those baskets and it was like it meant nothing to him.

Sabrina- No, I think he just didn't want to rub our noses in it.

Harvey- At least he hasn't tried to have a man to man talk with me.

Edward returns with a tray of drinks and eats.

Edward- Hey guys.

Sabrina- That was quick.

Edward- The line for sodas was really long so I got us carrot juices instead and little boxes of raisins.

Sabrina- Yum, yum. I'll be back with somethin' to eat.

She gets up and heads for the food stalls.

Edward- So Harvey, how's life?

Harvey- Fine, thanks for asking.

Edward- You mind if we have a talk, man to man?

Harvey- ...No?

Edward- Okay, here's the question. If you love a woman, d'you think you ought to marry her?

Harvey- Well I....

Edward- (Interrupting) Sure there are a million reasons not to but are any of them any good?

Harvey- A few might be.

Edward- But how do you know when you're ready? Maybe you never know, maybe one day you just have to take that leap.

Harvey- Sir, I'm only sixteen!

Int. Spellman kitchen. Zelda and Hilda have been baking. Zelda takes a tasty treat from the oven.

Zelda- Mmm, chutney, olive, peanut butter casserole.

Hilda- Oh, the pickled beets look great on top.

Zelda hears the front door.

Zelda- They're home.

Int. Spellman living room. Hilda and Zelda come through to meet Sabrina and Edward.

Zelda- Hi, did you have fun?

Sabrina- We had a blast.

Hilda- Sauerkraut dandy?

She hands the pie to Edward.

Edward- Thanks. Hey, d'ya know what I feel like doing now? Playing solitaire.

He takes his pie into the dining room.

Sabrina- (To her aunts) We have to talk, upstairs.

Zelda- Okay.

Hilda- Are we in trouble?

Int. Sabrina's bedroom. The conclave of witches convene.

Hilda- What's going on?

Sabrina- I'm worried about dad, I don't think he enjoyed the ice show.

Zelda- I'm sure he had a fine time.

Sabrina- No, he got really hostile. He even threw his souvenir Scott Hamilton cup at Scott Hamilton.

Hilda- Did he get him?

Sabrina- That's not the point, I think dad might be a little depressed. Look at this.

She hands Zelda the photo she took of her father and Harvey.

Zelda- Yuck!

Sabrina- Oh, that's ketchup, not blood. Anyway, I have an idea. I think I know how to make everything right.

She raises her hands and plucks a satellite dish from thin air.

Sabrina- (Cont.) Five hundred channels of mindless entertainment, he'll love it.

Zelda- Sabrina, I don't think pay per view is what will make your father happy.

Hilda- I think the problem is he misses Gail.

Sabrina- He didn't mention her all day.

Zelda- He didn't have to, this says it all.

She hands the photo back to Sabrina.

Hilda- See? His smiles more of a pain than a ping.

Sabrina- I can't stand to see him miserable, I've gotta do something.

Zelda- Honey, maybe you've done enough.

Sabrina- I'm gonna go talk to Gail.

Hilda- Do you think that's wise?

Sabrina- I'll let you know when I get back.

Sabrina takes a running dive head first into the book and vanishes.

Int. Magic book index. Sabrina enters. The room looks empty. There's lots of card index drawers, a desk and a clear, two foot wide plastic tube running up into the ceiling.

Sabrina- Hello? Anyone?

She sees a bell on the cabinet beside her and gives it a ding. A man with sleeve guards and a visor drops down in the plastic tube. He opens the door in it and steps out.

Walker, James T- May I help you?

Sabrina- I need to find someone but I don't know where they are.

Walker, James T- Then you've come to the right place, this is the index and I am the index keeper. Walker comma James T at your service and you are.

Sabrina- Sabrina...

Walker, James T- Hm, last name first.

Sabrina- Spellman comma Sabrina J?

They shake hands.

Walker, James T- Pleased to meet you. Now who are you looking for.

Sabrina- Her name is Gail.

Walker, James T- Last name first!

Sabrina- I don't know her last name.

Walker, James T-Cross reference.

He runs over to a rolodex.

Walker, James T- (Cont.) Do you know anything else about her?

Sabrina- She's a lawyer.

He flips through the rolodex and pulls out a card.

Walker, James T- There are one thousand three hundred and thirty two lawyers named Gail. You can start with Aardvark comma Gail Q.

Sabrina- I don't have time to go through a thousand Gail's.

Walker, James T- Then I need more information.

Sabrina- I know she likes hot fudge.

The index keeper runs over to a file index drawer but stops halfway there.

Walker, James T- We don't keep data on ice cream topping preferences.

Sabrina- What do you keep data on?

Walker, James T- Shoe size, neck size, birth date, last book read, blood type, skin Ph, fatal flaw...

Sabrina- Wait! I know her blood type, it's um E negative.

Walker, James T- A rare one.

He opens the blood type drawer a riffles through the index cards.

Walker, James T- A-ha! that cuts down to two. Boulder comma Gail and Kipling comma Gail.

Sabrina- Well I'm in kind of a hurry, is there anything else you can tell me about them?

The index keeper looks around to make sure no one is else is around and pulls out a small blanket to cover the budgie cage.

Walker, James T- Technically, I'm not supposed to say this but er, one of these Gail's has an extremely high skin Ph. Is your Gail scaly?

Sabrina- No.

Walker, James T- Then I'd go with Kipling comma Gail. Page eight seventy-five.

Sabrina- Great, how do I get there?

Walker, James T- Tube lift.

He guides Sabrina to the plastic tube and opens the door for her. She steps inside.

Walker, James T- (Cont.) This will send you directly to your page.

He closes the door.

Walker, James T- (Cont.) Bend your knees.

Sabrina does and is catapulted up the tube.

Sabrina- Whoa!

Walker, James T- Now where in the Hill comma Sam did I leave my keys?

Int. Tube lift. Sabrina swoops and swirls as she propelled through the magic book until she arrives at page eight seventy-five. She steps out.

Int. Page 875. Gail's office. Sabrina comes out of the tube lift. Gail works at her desk

Sabrina- Gail.

Gail doesn't look up from her work.

Gail- Who is it?

Sabrina- Sabrina, can we talk?

Gail looks up at that.

Gail- Now is not a good time, I'm very busy exploring the profit potential of Drell suing himself.

Sabrina- I'll be quick, I just came to tell you how much my dad misses you.

Gail- Duly noted. Now if you don't mind I'm working.

Sabrina- But you can't just stop seeing him.

Gail- I'm sorry, I can't think about Ted or anything else until I get these papers off my desk.

Sabrina- Then let me help you.

With a wave of her hand all the papers and scrolls on Gail's desk are swept onto the floor.

Gail- What do you think you're doing!

Sabrina- Your desk is clear, now can we talk?

Gail- You've got five minutes.

Sabrina- Good, I'll take them over here.

They go over to the office couch and sit

Sabrina- (Cont.) Look, I don't know much about adult relationships but I know you're making a big mistake.

Gail- Oh really?

Sabrina- Yeah, my dad's the coolest. I mean he's fun and thoughtful and kind, and if there's a good movie on he'll let you stay up late.

Gail- I'm well aware of your father's good points, that's why I said yes when you asked if I thought we'd get married.

Sabrina- So what's the problem?

Gail- He said no.

Sabrina- He just needs time. The divorce was really hard on him and my mom, they thought their marriage was gonna last for ever, not twelve years which is a lot shorter. So now he's a little freaked out but just be patient. I keep telling him he has to move on.

She realises a truth in that moment.

Sabrina- (Cont.) We all have to move on.

Gail- How much time do you think he'll need?

Sabrina- Well it's hard to say but the question you have to ask yourself is not do you want to get married but do you love my dad?

Gail- I do.

Sabrina- Then you should be together, it's as simple as that. You know that love between two people is stronger than any legal document.

Gail- Yes, but as a lawyer I'm not supposed to admit it.

Int. Spellman living room. Edward sits at the coffee table playing solitaire, and cheating. Sabrina comes down the stairs with Gail.

Sabrina- Dad, someone's here to see you.

Edward- Do they have a three of clubs?

Gail- Ted.

He looks up from his cards

Edward- Gail!

Sabrina- I'll leave you two alone.

She dashes off to do just that. Edward and Gail look at one another for a moment and then they are in each others arms. Ted smiles, his teeth have a sparkly ping about them.

Int. Spellman kitchen. Zelda and Hilda sit at the table with three open jars before them.

Hilda- Okay, we're down to the last three jars. I'll eat the fluff, you eat the marmalade, we'll split the capers.

Zelda- Deal.

Hilda pours half the capers into Zelda's marmalade as Sabrina enters.

Sabrina- Gail's back.

Hilda- She is?

Zelda- That's wonderful.

Sabrina- Yeah, I'm so happy for dad. I'm really, really happy for dad, but what about mom?

Zelda- Why don't you call her in Peru, see how she's doing?

Sabrina- I talked to her yesterday, I just wish I could see her.

Hilda- You could with the magic sneak-a-peek.

Hilda points at the secret cabinet and it opens

Sabrina- What's that?

Zelda- It's a very powerful magnifier that allows you to key into anyone on the planet.

Sabrina- Isn't that like eaves dropping?

Hilda- Yes, but the pictures too fuzzy to make anybody uncomfortable.

Hilda brings over the ornate magnifying glass and hands it to Sabrina.

Zelda- Just hold it up to the map in your magic book and you'll see your mom.

Sabrina- Cool, thanks.

Hilda- You're welcome.

Sabrina goes off upstairs.

Hilda- (Cont.) That'll make her feel better.

Zelda- Yeah.

She takes another spoonful of her marmalade and capers mix.

Zelda- (Cont.) You know it's crazy but this is really hitting the spot.

Int. Sabrina's bedroom. Salem lies on the bed as Sabrina opens up the magic book.

Salem- What are you doin'?

Sabrina- Taking a peek at my mom.

She focuses the magnifier on South America, the continent enlarges in the glass. She shifts the focus to Peru and sees the mountains through the clouds. She fine tunes onto the Andes and find the waterfall beside the dig and finally focuses in on the two figures grubbing in the dirt side by side.

Sabrina- I see her, there she is!

She watches for a moment as the two archaeologists talk and laugh, there's no sound though through the magnifier.

Sabrina- (Cont.) I guess I don't have to worry about mom anymore.

Salem- She's happy?

Sabrina- Yeah, she loves her work.. and her colleague is really cute. So I'm pleased to say everyone's moved on.

Salem- Not me, I'm stayin' put. There's an exciting shaft of light on the ceiling that'll keep me here for the next five hours.

Sabrina- So there is. Well enjoy it Salem, you deserve it.

She smiles at her cat and there's a pinging sparkly flash from her teeth.

Sabrina- (Cont.) Hey, I pinged!

Int. Spellman living room. Sabrina, Hilda, Zelda, Gail and Edward are playing charades. Edward hold out the top hat to Sabrina who takes a slip of paper.

Edward- Go get em.

Sabrina- I still don't see why I had to be on aunt Hilda's team.

Run credits.

Sabrina stands and reads the slip of paper then hands it to Gail.

Sabrina- Ready?

Hilda- U-hu!

Sabrina starts her mime raising her hands to her side.

Hilda- It's a play.

Sabrina shows five fingers then another one.

Hilda- Fifty-one word!

Sabrina tries again this time using both hands.

Hilda- Six words.

Sabrina holds up one finger.

Hilda- First word.

Sabrina pulls at her ear lobe.

Hilda- Sounds like.

Sabrina makes a motion of putting something on her head.

Hilda- Air traffic controller.

Sabrina shakes her head and tries again.

Hilda- Smiling air traffic controller.

Sabrina tries once more.

Hilda- I can't think of anything else.

Sabrina uses the pointy finger mime and conjures a corrugated tin roof for the coffee table complete with chimney and Salem hops from paw to paw on it.

Salem- Aw! Aw! Aw! Aw! Aw! Aw!

Hilda- Oh, cat on a hot tin roof.

Sabrina- Yes!

They high five.



Pic of the Week